Hellbound Jew [MUSIC VIDEO]

After a lifetime of suffering under Orthodox oppression, these Jewish brothers are fighting back. Or singing back. Or fighting back with music. Or something.

Short Films by Josh Bass/Non-Practicing Productions

Bass on Youtube
http://www.youtube.com/user/basshole1979?feature=mhum#p/a/u/0/PA9R63bkcZc
Bass on Vimeo
http://vimeo.com/joshbass/videos

AOL Commercial Parody

Yup, that’s my clever title. A parody of c. 2002 AOL commercials.  Does anyone even have AOL anymore? Is that still a thing?

The Ninjews

Jewish brothers Yoav and Fyvush Goldsteinfeldbergowitzblumbaum are mohels (professional circumcisors) who gain ninja powers during a freak foreskin removal accident, and go on to become anti-anti-Semite superheroes.  In this episode, the Ninjews must stop a giant Nazi pig from tempting a young Jewish boy to break his kosher vows.

For more Ninjews info see the Ninjews page.

Peter and I

Al and Peter have been best friends their whole lives, but now find they want different things.  Is this the end of their friendship?  Oh, and did I mention Peter was Al's penis? Yeah.

Sluttrex [COMMERCIAL PARODY]

Are you a young lady in the modern world, full of enthusiasm and vigor,  who enjoys a variety of strange dudes taking the overnight train to Cooterville? Then this might be just the medication for you!  Oh, but watch out for the side effects.

Ponda [COMMERCIAL PARODY]

So about 2002-3, there were these annoying Honda commercials that featured people driving while having inane conversations (e.g. “do squirrels exercise?”--ah, now you’re remembering, aren’t you?). The idea being that since the car was so awesome, you didn't have to worry about driving at all, and could think about these mundane things.  So in 2003, this was mildly hilarious.

Joey and Jerome’s Excellent Action Movie

Joey and Jerome are two connoisseurs of the cinema arts. . .as long as those cinema arts involve exploding buildings and bleeding chest wounds.  Inspired by watching a killer Ben Affleck action movie (back when such things existed), they immediately decide to create their own action-packed cinematic masterpiece. . .with no money, resources, or experience.

Credit

A strange little experimental short film about movie credits fighting over who truly gets the right to call a movie their own. No don't read that again, you had it right the first time.

Every Seven Minutes

If your alarm clock goes off and you wanna go back to sleep, you just hit snooze or turn it off, right?  RIGHT???  (Cue scary music).

Joey and Jerome’s Artistic Meaningful Independent Film

“I’ll detonate the nukes in 24 hours unless you surrender the command codes.” If those words ain’t spoken in a movie, Joey and Jerome ain’t watchin’ it.  After spending their entire lives watching Bruce Willis, Jason Statham, and Vin Diesel fill various Englishmen, Russians, Germans, nonspecific Middle Easterners, and the occasional Asian full of hot lead, the two get a wakeup call when Jerome’s sister lends them several of her arthouse flicks on DVD.   After an indie movie marathon, the pair are so inspired they immediately begin work on their own independent masterpiece. . .with no money, resources, or experience.  For more info see the Joey and Jerome page.

Partly Foggy

A poignant cautionary tale about the dangers of romance in outer space

The Ninjews: Therapy

Yoav Goldsteinfeldbergowitzblumbaum is a mohel with a secret identity as a Jewish ninja superhero, but he's also a regular guy doing regular things when he's not battling evil or de-foreskinning babies. Today he's going to therapy to talk about his crippling porn addiction. For more Ninjews info see the Ninjews page.

These are (allegedly) comedic short films that I’ve written and directed.  Leave your thoughts in the comments section.   HA! Gotcha! There is no comments section!  But you can try telepathy.   If I feel a blinding, sharp pain behind my eye, I’ll know someone was displeased.

Contactmailto:joshbass1979@gmail.com?subject=question/comment/snide%20remark%20for%20The%20Bassmailto:joshbass1979@gmail.com?subject=question/comment/snide%20remark%20for%20The%20Bassshapeimage_6_link_0
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Bass on IMDBhttp://www.imdb.com/name/nm1981765/http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1981765/mailto:joshbass1979@gmail.com?subject=question/comment/snide%20remark%20for%20The%20Bassshapeimage_14_link_0shapeimage_14_link_1
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Glirk Pasternakky, Internet Comedian (commercial)

Glirk Pasternakky is a standup comedian. . .well, really a "sit-down" comedian--BAZUMP! See, when he tried performing live, audiences didn't get his esoteric, post-modern, Kafakaesque take on the tropes of modern existence, so he took his act out of the clubs and onto the highway. . .THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY! That's right, he only performs online via social media. He is. . .the SOCIAL coMEDIA-an.


This short film has an ongoing social media component. You can get regular updates of Glirk’s comedic material at:


https://www.facebook.com/glirk on Facebook (“like” the page to subscribe),  http://twitter.com/glirkp on Twitter (follow the twitter feed to subscribe), or here on my site via the Glirk Pasternakky page.

Non-Practicing Productions Facebook Feed

Get updates about screenings/fests/lawsuits/plagiarism accusations below via Facebook.

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The Ninjews: Goy-L Trouble

Yoav and Fyvush Goldsteinfeldbergowitzblumbaum are your average mohels (that's "dudes who give your newborn's weiner a facelift", as defined by Webster's) with secret identities as Jewish ninja superheroes.  When Fyvush begins dating  a Catholic woman, Yoav tries to put his reservations aside and be open-minded. But is this apparently sweet girl all she seems? (PSSST. . .she's not. She's a demonic supervillain out to convert everyone to Catholicism. Crap, I spoiled it. Sorry.)  For more Ninjews info see the Ninjews page.

HTC You in Hell

Have you ever wondered what happens when a blog post has a threesome with a fever dream and some LSD? What happens is this movie.

Dating Profile

“Josh B” tries to meet with women with this strangely honest look into what makes him tick.